Funny Valentine
by Agarwaen Lhach
Summary: Complete. Was Love and Hate Relationship. Ginny gets bored one day and decides that she’s tired of Ron and Hermione in denial. So she makes a bet with Harry: the two of them can get Ron and Hermione together before Valentine’s Day, in exactly eight da
1. Things Boredom Makes you Do

Summary: Ginny gets bored one day and decides that she's tired of Ron and Hermione in denial. So she makes a bet with Harry: the two of them can get Ron and Hermione together before Valentine's Day, in exactly eight days.  
  
Disclaimer: Not mine.  
  
This is a challenge for me too. Can Agarwaen Lhach finish a fic in eight days? Doubtful, but there is always hope. Also, the days of the week correspond to those this year. So this is a Friday.  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter One: Things Boredom Makes you Do  
  
"Harry."  
  
No answer.  
  
"Harry!"  
  
He can really sleep soundly, the redhead thought. She crept right up to his ear and yelled, "HARRY!"  
  
Still nothing. Ginny grinned evilly, twirled her wand, and whispered, "Aqua Defundo!"  
  
The Floodgate Charm was instantaneous. A gallon of water poured from midair onto the wizard's head. He woke up immediately, spluttering indignantly.  
  
"Ginny, what was that for?"  
  
"I was bored," she said, flopping back into a chair by the fireplace.  
  
She absentmindedly twirled her wand and pointed it at Harry, muttering another spell that dried him off. She sighed deeply.  
  
"I've got an Arithmancy test Monday," she complained.  
  
"I'll test you," Harry offered.  
  
"Here."  
  
She tossed him her textbook. It slammed into his chest.  
  
"Oops. Sorry. Too much Quidditch practice."  
  
"That won't make me any easier on you," Harry grumbled, rubbing the spot where the corner of the book had struck him.  
  
He opened it to a page bookmarked with a tag reading, "Test Material." He looked at her with an eyebrow raised.  
  
"You're turning into a red-haired, Quidditch-obsessed version of Hermione."  
  
"I am not!"  
  
There was a worksheet tucked into the page. He read the first question. "Those whose number is one's talents and strengths are..."  
  
Ginny thought for a moment. "Natural leader, self-sufficient, ambitious. Twos are loving, peace-making, and analytical...oh, I know all this. I've gotten obsessed with Arithmancy."  
  
"Than what's my Destiny number?" he challenged.  
  
Ginny snatched the study guide and scribbled down various letters and numbers for a few minutes.  
  
"Five," she answered finally. "You are bold, daring, persuasive, and enjoy the finer things."  
  
Harry snorted.  
  
"You are easily sidetracked and restless to the point of boredom."  
  
"I am not easily sidetracked! Just the other day in Binns's class-"  
  
"You generally take chances and search for new opportunities."  
  
"I-"  
  
"You are a public figure and receive lots of attention from the media, and you are good at developing new ideas."  
  
"Now that's a little creepy. Is that really what the book says?"  
  
She pointed at the chart. "See for yourself.  
  
He did. "Weird."  
  
"I told you, I'm not doing your homework for you!"  
  
"Here we go again," Harry groaned.  
  
Hermione and Ron had just come through the portrait hole, arguing again. They had been down in the library, last anyone checked, working on homework. Apparently it had ended badly.  
  
"Hermione, no one but you can ever pay attention in History of Magic! I just need you to check my paper over."  
  
"I told you, you'll never learn if you don't make a few mistakes. Besides, N.E.W.T.s are coming up, and then what will you do to study?"  
  
"Read your notes."  
  
"You-"  
  
"I would love to tell those two to get a room, if I wasn't so incredibly sure that they'd both dismember me," Ginny muttered as she packed her Arithmancy book back into her bag.  
  
"What?" Harry said, startled.  
  
The youngest Weasley stared at him in disbelief. "Don't tell me you didn't notice?"  
  
"Notice what?"  
  
Ginny sighed, shaking her head. "Men."  
  
"What?" he said indignantly.  
  
"They've been crazy about each other since the fourth year!"  
  
"What-what-"  
  
"Did you know that when your mouth's like that, it looks exactly like you're a fish?"  
  
Harry shut his mouth and glared. Ginny smirked and started up the stairs. Halfway up, she had an idea. Instantly she whirled and jogged back down.  
  
"Harry!" she hissed, still not overheard, thanks to Ron and Hermione's argument.  
  
"What now?"  
  
"I have a plan."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I can get those two together before Valentine's Day," she said, grinning.  
  
"You'll need me to help."  
  
"Do I have to?"  
  
"You only ever see them after school hours. I have almost every class with both of them."  
  
"I bet we can do it," Ginny said, smirking again. "Go on, I bet you."  
  
"I bet we can't."  
  
"Fine, then. Bring it on. But don't sabotage the plans."  
  
"Fine. But if I win, you have to declare your undying love for Draco Malfoy in the full Great Hall."  
  
Ginny's smirk widened an inch. "If I win, you have to do the same thing." Harry's jaw dropped in horror. "But for Snape."  
  
"Unfair!"  
  
"It's no better than Draco Malfoy."  
  
"At least he's number two on the Hogwarts' Hottest Males list! Snape is somewhere in the negatives!"  
  
"My point precisely, Mr. Hogwarts' Hottest Male."  
  
He scowled at her. "Aww..."  
  
"Tomorrow we begin Phase One," Ginny said, grinning eagerly. "Here's the plan..." 


	2. The Infamous Hogwarts Grapevine

Since I didn't update yesterday, I'm going to try to both finish this chapter and then do a whole new one. If I don't, I'll have to change one chapter to the epilogue so I don't have to post it until February 15.  
  
I realized while writing this chapter - Ginny is turning into me! You don't understand the half of my evilness yet!  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter Two: The Infamous Hogwarts Grapevine  
  
Hermione woke up the next morning to Parvati and Lavender's morning gossip. She rolled out of bed and went into the bathroom to put on her clothes, because if she dressed in the room, there was about a 99% chance that the girls would want to share whatever absolutely fascinating tidbits they had learned.  
  
To her surprise, the other two girls in her dorm, Sabine Paeligini and Kat Hall, were also chattering with each other. It was only very strange because the two of them were much shyer than the rest of Gryffindor House. They tended to stay in the dorm or library, and were rarely to be found in the common room, where the gossipy girls lurked, hoping to find something to spread around the school.  
  
"Is it true?" they both said instantaneously when Hermione entered.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Harry and Ginny," Kat said excitedly.  
  
Sabine said something very quickly. Given her strong accent and the fact that she was naturally quiet, this made it almost impossible to comprehend.  
  
"What?" she said confusedly.  
  
"That they're going out on Valentine's Day," Sabine repeated breathlessly.  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"She didn't know," Kat said in a shocked tone.  
  
"Madre da Cristo," Sabine muttered, crossing herself.  
  
Hermione quickly ducked into a bathroom stall, pulled on my uniform as fast as she could, and bolted out the door and down several stairs until she reached the landing adjacent to the fifth year girls' dormitory. She pounded on the door.  
  
"Virginia Weasley, you are in so much trouble!" she yelled.  
  
A chorus of titters answered her. She banged on the door again. A tiny little blonde girl opened it.  
  
"Ginny's not here!" she giggled. "She's in the common room!"  
  
"With Harry!" came a loud shriek from behind her.  
  
Hermione bolted down the stairs and into the common room. Ginny was calmly lounging back on the couch reading through her Arithmancy textbook.  
  
"What - you - did you - are you - " Hermione stammered.  
  
"Am I going out with Harry on Valentine's Day?" Ginny replied. "Is there something wrong with that?"  
  
"But - I thought - you and Dean - "  
  
"Oh, that's over," Ginny scoffed.  
  
"B-but..."  
  
Hermione leaped up the stairs to the sixth year boys' dorm two at a time and pounded on the door.  
  
"HARRY JAMES POTTER!"  
  
Ron opened the door. "He just left." He did a double take. "Hermione, you're not supposed to be up here!"  
  
"DidyouknowheandGinnyaregoingoutonValentinesDay?" she said quickly in one breath.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Did you know Harry and Ginny are going out on Valentine's Day?"  
  
"What - why - I thought - "  
  
"My response exactly."  
  
"I'll kill them," both said at the same time. "Neither of them told me, I'll kill them."  
  
Meanwhile, In the Common Room...  
  
"I am too good," Ginny said, smirking evilly. "On February 14, I will laugh as you stand on top of the Gryffindor table and announce your ever-burning love for Severus Snape to the entire staff and student body."  
  
"Meh..."  
  
"Ha. I should thank those gossipy girls in my dorm."  
  
"Exactly how does this chain go?"  
  
"I tell everyone in my dorm, they tell Lavender who tells Parvati who tells the rest of the seventh-year Gryffindor girls and Padma, who tells the Ravenclaws, half of which tell the Slytherins, a few of which tell the Hufflepuffs, who tell the remaining Gryffindors. So the whole school should think we're going to Madame Puddifoot's on Valentine's Day. Of course, said rumor will be squashed once you shout your love for Grease-Haired Monster- Nosed No-Balls Severus Snape to the entire school."  
  
Harry scowled. "Why did I ever make this bet?"  
  
"I don't know. Probably because you didn't realize the extent of my evilness. But once Hermione and Ron are united in their attempts to murder us slowly, the rest of this will be easy."  
  
"Why are we risking our reputations for this?"  
  
"Because I said so."  
  
"And I thought Ron wanted you to go out with me."  
  
"I'm impressed. You know."  
  
"Ron's a great guy, but he has no subtlety."  
  
"He's made because he wanted it to be on his terms. He doesn't want me dating until I'm a sixth year, so that's half of it. The other half's that he wants to be dating Hermione first."  
  
"I see."  
  
"Do you really?"  
  
"No."  
  
"That's what I thought." 


	3. Classical Art

Keep in mind, this is a day after the last chapter. Each chapter is one day. Sometimes it's only about an hour from one day (like the last one) but each one is always the day after the last.  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter Three: Classical Art  
  
Harry and Ginny were sitting on one of the couches in the common room. Harry was apparently leaning over her shoulder to help with her Defense Against the Dark Arts homework. Ron and Hermione occupied a couch behind them, pretending to be working on History of Magic papers, while watching Harry and Ginny over the top of the book.  
  
"They're probably talking about where they'll go on Friday," Hermione hissed.  
  
"Please not Madame Puddifoot's."  
  
"Why do you say that?"  
  
"Because then I can't follow them. The place revolts me."  
  
"Ron!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"You can't follow them!"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because there can't be two people tailing them."  
  
"If anyone follows them, it'll be me. Ginny's my sister!"  
  
"She's my friend!"  
  
"Your book's upside down," Ginny said.  
  
Hermione and Ron both instantly shut up. Hermione sheepishly flipped the book and ducked behind it. Harry and Ginny did the same, propping the book so that it shielded them from Hermione and Ron's view.  
  
"How long d'you think?" Harry whispered.  
  
"Now."  
  
The blonde girl from Ginny's dorm was running down the stairs, followed by four friends, all blonde and tittering. The first one was holding a piece of paper and giggling at it.  
  
"Let me see, Loretta!" one of the girls squealed.  
  
"Kimmie, it's mine! Stop it, Mandy! Marcella, I told you you're not getting it!"  
  
"See what I have to deal with?" Ginny muttered to Harry.  
  
Loretta plopped down into a chair by the fireplace and let the other girls read over her shoulder. Instantly they began giggling uncontrollably and glancing over at Hermione, who looked extremely annoyed and raised the book an inch.  
  
"Oh, for heaven's sake," Hermione sighed. "Lavender and Parvati have passed it on."  
  
"They're allowed to laugh, Hermione."  
  
"But they don't have to giggle so loudly. It disturbs people who are actually working!"  
  
"Some people do their homework during class."  
  
"They're not supposed to."  
  
"Yes, but if you do most of it in History of Magic, you stay awake and you can hear what Binns is saying and remember enough of it to pass."  
  
"If you'd just stay awake anyways it wouldn't be as hard!"  
  
"Hermione, if I was a Muggle, they'd probably slap me with a big sticker that says ADD on it. You can go without sleep for days on end and are still able to ace every class; is it nice to gloat about it?"  
  
"That has nothing to do with anything!"  
  
"It has everything to do with it!"  
  
"No it doesn't! We were talking about what should and shouldn't be done in class!"  
  
Another chorus of giggles rose from the corner. Hermione slapped the book down, stormed over to the corner, and snatched the paper.  
  
"Give me that," she snapped.  
  
Her eyes bugged when she saw what it was. A large, detailed, picture in color depicted her and Ron snogging behind their book. Hermione's face gradually turned redder and she marched over to where Dean sat with Seamus struggling through a Potions essay.  
  
"Did you draw this?" she demanded, slapping the picture onto the table.  
  
Instantly both boys began sniggering. "I only wish I could claim that prophecy," Dean snickered.  
  
Hermione made an indignant sound somewhere between a shriek and a snort, crumpled the picture, and threw it with all her might into a corner. She stormed back to the couch, retrieved her book from Ron, stomped into the girls' dorm and slammed the door.  
  
"Dean's a very good liar," Ginny said conversationally.  
  
"I think all of Gryffindor's in on this now."  
  
"I wonder what will happen tomorrow. The first day of school after we've sparked this lovely chain of events."  
  
"First we need Dean to color that."  
  
"Definitely," Ginny agreed.  
  
She retrieved the crumpled picture from the corner and straightened it, handing it back to Dean and muttering in his ear. He laughed.  
  
"Sure," he said, glancing conspiratorially towards Harry. "But I'll need Lavender and Parvati's help."  
  
"Why do I have the feeling that I just sold my soul?" Harry said tentatively as Ginny returned.  
  
"Because I did it for you."  
  
"What now?"  
  
"You'll see tomorrow."  
  
"No, really."  
  
"I'm not telling you. But I will if you do something for me."  
  
"I'm almost afraid to ask."  
  
"You get to embarrass Snape."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Here's the plan for Phase Three..." 


	4. Comparing Notes

I stand stunned. Such wonderful reviews! I love reviews. They make me sit at my computer and squeal with happiness!  
  
And in this chapter is some blackmail of Snape (I couldn't resist kicking around Slytherins), the DADA teacher (if you know who she is, kudos to you!), Ginny showing her dark side, and Ron and Hermione having a tremendous fight. Also a few hints...  
  
The Padawan comment. Ah. Yes. I did warn you that Ginny was turning into me.  
  
Also, I have decided that there will be only three more chapters. I can't get a chapter uploaded a day; it's killing me. There will be the potion taking effect, the deciding factor in who wins the bet, and then the person declaring their love for the Slytherin assigned. I am truly evil.  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter Four: Comparing Notes  
  
Since Ginny's first class was Arithmancy and Harry's was N.E.W.T. Defense Against the Dark Arts (the classrooms were next to each other) they were able to walk to class together Monday morning and discuss Phase Three.  
  
"How did you get him to do it?" Harry said amazedly, shaking his head.  
  
"'Tis a matter, of leverage, my young Padawan," Ginny said, smiling wickedly and tapping her forehead.  
  
"You're scaring me."  
  
"I think I'm scaring Snape more."  
  
"Will you please tell me how you did it?"  
  
"No. That would be too cruel. If he does betray our agreement, I shall stand on top of the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall and shout it to the school."  
  
"Now I'm just confused."  
  
"Good."  
  
The bell rang. As both students rushed into their classes, Ginny called, "Sit in the far left corner! And don't lean your books against the wall!"  
  
Harry did so, somewhat bemusedly. Professor Carter launched into a lengthy explanation of the importance of knowing Latin in defensive spells. As soon as she turned around, Harry tapped on the wall. He felt a slight sting in his finger.  
  
"Ow!"  
  
"Potter!" Professor Carter called. "Please pay attention! Five points from your house."  
  
She turned around and started writing various incantations on the board. Harry felt the part of the wall where his hand had been. A clean, smooth hole had been burnt through the stone. Apparently a Reductor Curse; a good one if it could burn through stone and not be noticed. Two long, slim fingers with nails sharpened to points and painted alternately red and gold pushed a roll of paper through. Harry glanced towards Carter to make sure she wasn't watching, snatched the note and quickly read it.  
  
Oh, I'm evil, it read in smooth, curling script.  
  
Harry scribbled a reply and stuffed it back into the hole. Carter will flay us both alive! Gryffindor's points will drop below negative!  
  
So? Vector'll bail me out. She likes me because I'm about half a point away from beating her best student ever. Hermione. Of course.  
  
You are insane!  
  
Very much so. But 'tis I that set Phase Three up, and 'tis I that can bring it down.  
  
What is it with you and "'tis" today?  
  
'Tis fun. You should try it. Have some fun sometimes. Smile.  
  
I don't smile enough?  
  
Harry, you don't smile at all. Ever since XXX XXXXXXXXXX XX XXXXXXXXX. She had apparently crossed something out, replacing it with, Not for ages.  
  
Harry didn't write anything back. For the rest of the class he sank into a stupor. He could ace this class with his eyes closed - and was. He'd gotten a perfect score on his DADA O.W.L.  
  
His second class of the day was N.E.W.T. Potions. Hermione took N.E.W.T. level for all her classes, including Potions, but Ron did not, which was crucial to the overall plan.  
  
"Take your seats," Snape snapped, swooping into the dungeon.  
  
He seemed in an even fouler mood than usual, most likely from whatever information Ginny held over his head. He glared darkly at Harry, who looked angelic, making Snape's scowl deepen quite a bit.  
  
"Directions on the board," he said shortly. "Ingredients on the cupboard."  
  
Harry smirked at Snape as he strode by. Snape replied with a scornful sneer.  
  
"Remember," Harry said in a low voice as Hermione went for their supplies, "I know."  
  
A somewhat panicked expression flicked across the professor's face, leaving Harry with a vindictive sense of satisfaction.  
  
Hermione returned with the ingredients. Harry slipped a book under his desk, flipped it to the bookmarked page, and began the work.  
  
It had been Ginny's idea to replace Hermione's potion with a Love Potion identical in appearance and with a difference of only a few ingredients. The problem had been finding one that matched Snape's next lesson plan (filched by Ginny). Neither had been able to find one, so Ginny had gotten some kind of blackmail information she waved over Snape's head like much- needed shampoo. So Snape found a potion that was nearly identical - same color, smell, light mist, and the only ingredient that was added was that the Love Potion required a drop of blood from whoever you wanted the person to follow in love with. Ginny had apparently sneaked into Ron's room the night before, pricked his finger, and caught the blood in a tiny vial. Harry looked around to make sure no one was watching, then tapped the vial. The red drop rolled down the glass and dropped into the potion. Instantly it turned a vivid pink, and the glowing mist hovering above it turned red. When Hermione turned around, Harry quickly switched her cauldron with his. The rest of the ingredients he left her to add. They would be done perfectly. He silently smirked and completed the potion in Hermione's cauldron.  
  
At the end of the class, Snape stood at the front of the room. "Fill a vial with your Anti-Stress Solution and leave it on my desk. Do what you wish with the rest."  
  
Harry knew how much stress Hermione was under, what with her being a prefect, all the homework being assigned, and the pre-N.E.W.T. exams they would take in March. He watched her out of the corner of his eye as he left the potion on the edge of a heavily scowling Snape's desk. She filled a vial and had Neville take it up to Snape. She looked briefly around, dipped another vial into the cauldron, and swallowed the liquid within.  
  
Harry smirked. If he did such a thing, he would have leaned back in his chair, steepled his fingers and said, "Eeexcellent." The potion would take effect by the next morning. All he had to do was sit and wait. 


	5. Love Potion Number 9

::gasps and passes out:: So.........many.........reviews!!! Hence, new chapter!  
  
A much more angsty chapter than the others. But it's longer, and it has more use to the overall plot.  
  
I would have updated yesterday, but I couldn't log in ::grr.........:: But here it is, in all of its newfound glory.  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter Five: Love Potion #9  
  
Hermione awoke the next morning feeling very cheerful. The first thing she thought of, instead of the usual homework, was Ron, strangely enough. Then she thought of the Defense Against the Dark Arts homework from the night before that she hadn't finished.........  
  
But a strange, happy calm slid over her just before the panic set in. It was just one assignment, and after all, she'd gotten O's on all the others. If she made it up tonight, it would drop to an E, but she could always do a bit of extra credit to make it up. She smiled, slid out of bed, put on her uniform, and, on the spur of the moment, decided to braid her hair. She noticed that it wasn't quite as bushy as it used to be with mild surprise. Before she left for breakfast, she brushed on just a light layer of eyeshadow and a touch of lipstick.  
  
Ginny was waiting in the common room. "Hermione, did it work?" she whispered.  
  
"Yes. How's your side of the plot coming?"  
  
"Well.........I think."  
  
"You think?"  
  
"Something happened yesterday........."  
  
"Don't tell me. I'll find out soon. Where's Ron?"  
  
"At breakfast already. Come on, we'll be late."  
  
They snatched their bags and hurried to the Great Hall. Sure enough, Harry and Ron had started their breakfast already. Ginny sat on Harry's right, and Hermione on Ron's left.  
  
"Did you do something with your hair?" Ron asked.  
  
"I did," Hermione said, beaming. "I thought you wouldn't notice!"  
  
Ginny and Harry exchanged smirks from behind their spoons.  
  
The only classes Ron and Hermione shared were N.E.W.T. Care of Magical Creatures, N.E.W.T. Charms, N.E.W.T. Transfiguration, N.E.W.T. History of Magic, and N.E.W.T. Defense Against the Dark Arts. Harry had all the same classes, and Ginny was conveniently nearby. There was a very amusing incident in the hall between Charms and Transfiguration involving Hermione's book and it "accidentally" falling at Ron's feet — or rather, on; Hermione missed.  
  
For the entire day Ginny and Harry smirked at each other in the hall as Ginny became more and more confident her plan would succeed. She had everything planned. The world was her oyster, and she was scooping it out with her bare fingers without breaking a nail. Her classmates kept staring at her oddly, probably due to the occasional mad giggle.  
  
After class, Ginny and Harry met on the grounds. Ginny was smiling happily, while Harry was starting to look worried.  
  
"You won't really make me stand on top of the table and say that my deepest heart's desire is to shag Snape, will you?"  
  
"Harry, how dirty!"  
  
"I'm screwed."  
  
"Yes, you are," Ginny agreed cheerfully.  
  
"Exactly how long have you known they liked each other?"  
  
"Try since they were fourth years. It's so obvious!"  
  
"How can you tell these things?"  
  
"What they said around each other, about each other. Ron's deep and utter hate of Viktor Krum."  
  
"I just thought he didn't like Krum."  
  
Ginny sighed. "Men."  
  
"Why do women always say that?"  
  
"Why do men always sigh, 'Women' after most of their dates?"  
  
"I don't do that........."  
  
"You've had what, one date? And what was your first word after Cho stomped off in a huff?"  
  
"How do you — "  
  
"That annoying girl from my dorm saw and told the entire year," Ginny laughed sheepishly as they reached Gryffindor Tower.  
  
"Wonderful," Harry said sarcastically.  
  
"I told her to shut her trap."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
Suddenly a loud yell came from the window above, and a window above slammed so hard glass shrapnel flew out of the pane and towards Harry and Ginny. They sidestepped it and began running back to Gryffindor Tower.  
  
"Password?" the Fat Lady asked austerely.  
  
"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!" Ginny gasped.  
  
Already they could hear a tremendous fight going on as they clambered through the portrait hole.  
  
Ron and Hermione stood about a foot apart, shouting at each other at the top of their lungs. Everyone else had scattered to the staircases and the corners and edges of the common room.  
  
"I can't believe that you would actually listen to her!" Hermione screamed.  
  
"How dare you go behind my back like that, and with-with HIM of all people!"  
  
"I would never — "  
  
"I saw you with him!"  
  
"I didn't — "  
  
"I can't believe you would — "  
  
"I didn't! I swear I didn't!"  
  
"DON'T LIE TO ME!" Ron bellowed. Hermione stopped shouting, her lip starting to quiver. "I don't ever want to see you again, you conceited, arrogant, self-centered, Mudblood bitch!"  
  
Hermione gasped and staggered backwards as if she had been slapped. Tears formed in her eyes and began to stream down her face. "But — but no, no, Ron, I told you, I love you!" she said tearfully.  
  
"Don't!" Ron said suddenly, but in a quiet voice, not a shout. "This isn't going to work."  
  
"Ron — " Hermione began, but he turned and silently sat down in one of the chair by the fireplace.  
  
Hermione stood in the middle of the room for a moment in total silence. Then she turned towards Ginny and began screaming in the middle of her tears.  
  
"This is all your fault! If not for your stupid plan Ron never would have seen what happened!"  
  
"Oh, so you're just upset that I saw?" Ron said loudly, rising.  
  
"It didn't happen like you think it did!" She turned back to Ginny and began shouting fiercely. "If not for your big plan to make Harry fancy you none of this ever would have happened!"  
  
Ginny gasped and shook her head, glancing at Harry with an alarmed look in her eyes. "Hermione, no!"  
  
"I don't care! I don't care what you think! I've covered for you, I've lied for you, and all it gets me is this!"  
  
Hermione whirled and dashed upstairs, sobbing uncontrollably. Ginny began to quietly cry as she pushed past Ron to take his chair. Ron stone-facedly strode to where Harry stood, quickly drew back his fist, and slugged him in the face. Harry yelled in outrage, pinching his bleeding nose.  
  
"Ron!" Ginny shrieked.  
  
"What was that for?" he said angrily.  
  
"Ginny," he said steadily.  
  
Harry punched Ron in the stomach. "That's for Hermione!"  
  
Before long it had escalated into an all-out free-for-all. Ginny screamed frustratedly and slammed a fist into the wall. It punched through the wood up to her elbow.  
  
"STOP IT!" she screamed. "JUST STOP IT!"  
  
She wrenched her fist out of the wall and followed Hermione's path up to her dormitory, leaving disaster in her wake. 


	6. Encounters

Still not quite as many funnies, but still very plot-essential.  
  
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis. I love that word. Whoever can find what it means first chooses which companion I will write for this: what Ron saw, Ginny and Hermione's inside story, or Snape's side.  
  
In this chapter: Harry and Ginny talk, several people don't talk, and Harry pulls a Giles.  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter Six: Encounters  
  
The series of arguments left silence in its wake. Ron and Hermione weren't speaking to each other, Hermione and Ginny weren't speaking to each other, Ginny and Ron weren't, Ron and Harry weren't, and Harry kept trying to talk to Ginny, but she ignored him. She grew so tired of his attempts of communication, she sealed up the hole between the DADA and Arithmancy classrooms.  
  
The night after the big fight, Ginny was to be found curled up in a secret loft at the top of the South Tower. The little coves were easily found if you knew where to look, or if your brothers were Fred and George Weasley. There were eight main ones, one at the top of each tower and one at the bottom. Ginny was fond of the South Tower Cove. It overlooked the lake and was the most comfortable of the eight, being not as cold or damp as the coves under the castle, not as hot as the North Tower Cove, and had a better view than the East and West Tower Coves. But another current advantage was its distance from Gryffindor Tower. She could do her homework without people pointing and whispering, and without Harry trying to talk to her.  
  
She sighed and tossed her completed Arithmancy essay aside. She was out of excuses to hide. Flipping out her wand, she said, "Accio Broom!"  
  
Her present for becoming a prefect, a Comet 360, soared through the trapdoor and onto her lap. She stroked her hands along the handle. The Comet 360 had all the speed and maneuverability of the Cleansweep 11, plus an Anti-Burglar Buzzer, inbuilt Warning Whistle, a Self-Straightening- Brush, inbuilt vibration control and anti-jinx varnish.  
  
"A nice broom, that," said a casual voice.  
  
Ginny stood up very quickly, and the broom rolled of her lap. Harry, sticking out of the trapdoor entrance from the waist up, caught it, and wriggled through the tiny hole.  
  
"How do you get through that thing?" he asked conversationally.  
  
"Please move," Ginny said quietly, looking down at the floor.  
  
"No," Harry refused simply.  
  
"Fine, then," Ginny replied coolly.  
  
She calmly mounted her broom and kicked open the long window in the side of the tower. With a hard kickoff, the broom took her at least fifty feet into the air — and that was just from the window.  
  
She steered the broom over the castle and towards a courtyard near the Great Hall. It was temporarily deserted, so there were no students to point and whisper. She tucked the broom under her arm and started off towards another one of the coves. To her utter fury, someone blocked her.  
  
"How did — why won't — " she spluttered angrily, glaring fiercely at Harry.  
  
He didn't move or answer. She tried to sidestep him and he blocked her again.  
  
"MOVE!" she shouted.  
  
"No! I want to know why you set all this up!"  
  
"Didn't you learn enough from Hermione?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"FINE!" she yelled.  
  
With an annoyed half-snarl, she plopped down onto a bench. Harry sat down next to her. Ginny took several deep breaths and began, her voice much calmer than it was a moment before.  
  
"Hermione and Ron have been dating since Hermione's sixteenth birthday. I got an idea, and Hermione agreed to help me with it. She knew about the plan."  
  
"What was the plan for, if Ron and Hermione were already going out?"  
  
"Partly so I could have a laugh when you lost."  
  
"Haha. So funny."  
  
"It would have been!" Ginny said defensively, but her voice was softening. "The other part was to...well..."  
  
"You wanted to get together with me."  
  
"Don't say it like that! I felt like I would never have a chance with you if you hardly knew me. I thought that a plan like this would give me a laugh and it would help you know me better."  
  
"It was a good plan," Harry admitted. "But Ginny, I — I — "  
  
"You don't like me that way," Ginny said heavily. "I know."  
  
"But I do know you a little better now. I would be glad to be your friend, if you would still let me."  
  
"Why would you think I wouldn't?"  
  
"To put it bluntly? I beat the stuffing out of your brother."  
  
"Ron's a prat. He deserved it. I've half a mind to break his nose myself. Speaking of which, how long did it take Madame Pomfrey to mend that?"  
  
"Six hours."  
  
"Nice, Harry."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"We'd better get back to the common room."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Ginny tucked her broom under her arm and smiled faintly all the way up to the common room.  
  
"Password?" the Fat Lady asked.  
  
"Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis," Ginny said in one breath.  
  
"Who thinks of these passwords?" Harry asked amazedly, shaking his head.  
  
Ginny raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Oh. I shouldn't have asked."  
  
They climbed through the portrait hole and into the common room. They went to sit on one of the couches by the fire and nearly sat on Ron and Hermione.  
  
"They've made up," Ginny noted.  
  
Harry took off his glasses and polished them on his shirt. "Yes, I am doing this so I won't see their excessive use of tongue."  
  
"Men," Ginny sighed, shaking her head and starting up to her dorm.  
  
She made sure that no one heard her crying that night. 


	7. Funny Valentine

A note to ur wunnerful wunnerful incredibly talented and smart friend who lubz chz friez(): I am posting, therefore I am allowed to say meh. Meh. How do ya like that?  
  
And here we have all the fun.  
  
I finished a fic! I finished a fic!  
  
Love/Hate Relationship  
  
Chapter Seven: Funny Valentine  
  
Ginny refused to wipe her smirk off all day when she passed Harry in the halls, which was often.  
  
"I won," she would remind him. "Pay up."  
  
And at every meal, he claimed he would do it at the next.  
  
Hermione and Ron spent the day in Hogsmeade, like most of the third, fourth, fifth and sixth years. Ginny spent her day a) working on homework, b) talking with Dean, and c) smirking. Mostly C.  
  
Once dinner came around, Ron and Hermione had still not returned. That was fine; they weren't fighting anymore, which was good, especially since they had a tendency to give Ginny and all her O.W.L. frenzy a headache.  
  
"Time to pay," Ginny said in a singsong voice as she and Harry sat down to dinner.  
  
"Meh," Harry grunted. (A/N: Ha, Sherina!)  
  
"You have to."  
  
"Meh."  
  
Someone passed a card under the table and onto her lap. She looked at it and smirked. "Ah. My valentine for Ron and Hermione."  
  
She looked at the inside. It read, "We would greatly appreciate it if you kept your fights and your snogging out of the common room. Happy Valentine's Day! Signed, Gryffindor.  
  
Indeed, every Gryffindor but Harry had signed. He snatched a quill and scribbled a note as well.  
  
Please.  
  
Ginny laughed as she closed the card and slipped it into her bag. Harry caught a glimpse of the drawing on the cover. It was the picture from a few days before, only with added color.  
  
Ginny decided she would see how long it would take her glaring at Harry to make him pay up on his side of the bet. She fixed a stare on him and waited to see how long he would noticed. She continued to unblinkingly stare until he was fully creeped.  
  
"Would you stop that?"  
  
"It works."  
  
"Yes, I'll pay! Fine!"  
  
He continued to grumble under his breath as he stood up on the table, his cheeks bright red and his ears a shade to rival Ron's.  
  
"ATTENTION, EVERYONE!" Ginny roared.  
  
Instantly there was silence. Everyone turned to stare at Harry.  
  
"Uh..." he stammered. "I-I..."  
  
"We're waiting," Ginny said loudly.  
  
"Er..." Ow, screw it, Harry thought. He almost said it, what Ginny had told him to. Then he realized the true purpose of her plan, what she had really wanted to hear. A moment before the words passed through his lips, he realized: I understand women!  
  
"I've fallen in love with Ginny Weasley," he blurted.  
  
A long ripple of gasps resounded from the mouths of every girl in the Great Hall. Even McGonagall, Vector, Sprout, Sinstra and Carter looked surprised, before the looks on their faces faded to faint delight.  
  
"Happy Valentine's Day, Ginny," Harry said.  
  
Happy tears were in Ginny's eyes. Harry dropped back onto the bench and she pulled his lips down onto hers in a sweet kiss. Every single female instantly said:  
  
"Aww!"  
  
Then they turned and began gossiping amongst themselves.  
  
"Happy Valentine's Day indeed," Ginny said, smiling, as they broke apart.  
  
She turned, pointed her wand at her throat, and whispered, "Sonorus!"  
  
Her voice bounced off the walls as she said, "SEVERUS SNAPE SLEEPS WITH A STUFFED RABBIT!"  
  
Once again, there was the curious effect of gasps from everyone in the hall. This time, though, it was followed by laughter and a deep red color forming in Snape's face.  
  
"Quietus," Ginny whispered.  
  
Meanwhile, at the back of the hall, Ron and Hermione entered hand in hand. They saw Ginny and Harry, who, once again, were kissing, and yelped.  
  
"What'd I miss?" Ron said confusedly.  
  
"A very, very funny Valentine!" Dean laughed.  
  
"A funny Valentine indeed," Hermione said, beaming.  
  
(And in big cursive letters in the air form the words while a choir sings them:)  
  
THE END! 


End file.
